FFS

So today was, in a couple of key ways, a shit-storm.

Found out an old friend died last night. He'd been sick for a long time, but it was a shock nonetheless.

Then, less than half an hour later, I found out that my best friend had had an emergency c-section and given birth to her second child, a son named Gus.

I burst into tears at the news.

How does that even happen?

What if she'd gone too?
How lucky am I?

Fuck.

I'm so sad and so happy.

And then I spent the rest of the day hidden beneath layers of thought and attempts to process said thoughts.

Which naturally led me to feeling like shit when a friend attempted to offer support, but I could only give her half of myself.

So. What a day.
At least when I got home N gave me a massage and I ate a good curry.
And now - bed. Because tomorrow is another day... which hopefully will be more mundane.