Working and Studying

The other day I had a little bit of an argument with Nannal. From his perspective it was probably nothing - just him teasing me. But for me it was a bit of a sting. See, he complained about the amount of money that he's been putting in the bills account relative to how much I contribute. Since he earns about 90% of our combined income I thought that was fair, but he said that I should be doing more around here... I wanted to slap, but I didn't.

Here are my go-to excuses.

1) I am studying at the moment. Granted, this argument is not very persuasive if I've just finished a solid day procrastinating ... but I think its a valid reason.

2) He spent a whole year mooching off me. He wasn't earning any money, he wasn't studying, and he didn't do that much cleaning. Ok, he did the dishes most of the time. But still. All he really did was play world of warcraft.

3) I DO a lot around here. The only time anything is ever cleaned is if I do it. The only time the random scattered booze bottles are ever cleared away (despite the fact that they are never mine) is when I do it. The only time the bathroom is cleaned (granted, that's not that often... bathrooms are smelly) is when I do it. The only time the clothes are picked up and sorted is when I do it. I could go on... So I DO a lot. He does very little - so nyeh.

4) Nyeh.


Ok the last one is probably not a very effective argument, but still.

I think I'm justified. Besides, it isn't like I haven't tried to get a better job. I have been applying for all manner of work since I finished my first degree. I've tried in all three levels of government. I've tried for big companies. I've tried for work interstate. I've tried in other retail positions. I've tried and tried and am sick of being knocked back. I'm the most qualified chocolate seller you can find.

But right now I think I'm pretty happy to be working in a chocolate shop a few times a week (although this coming week I only have ONE shift! Gah), while studying criminology - an area of study that is probably more likely to get me work than plain old anthropology (although I still love you Anthro!)


Le sigh. If only I could get paid for study (not by centrelink) and for doing genealogy. If only I could just paint stuff and have it sold for $300 a pop. If only I could go to sleep, and let my fingers write a brilliant piece of prose and then get published and rich. Sadly, I think I am going to have to work a bit harder for these things.



Now I might go off and analyse my life in terms of the criminal opportunities available to me and the social controls that prevent me from taking these opportunities... Or, I could study...

2010 on the horizon

The end of 2009 kind of shocks me. I mean, is it really the end of December? Really? Or is it some big joke and its still July or something. I guess it is a bit too warm to be July. 37C today... eew.

I suppose the reason that it doesn't feel like its been a whole year yet is that 2008 was such a huge year for me. So much happened! This year there have been a few things, but it was no 08, that's for sure. And really, that's a relief.

What happened this year? Well... most importantly I got a beautiful nephew. Charlie Jay Schunke is the best person in the world. I love his gummy little grin, his little open mouthed stare and the way he hoons around the living room in his little walker. He does no walking - only racing.

Mum told me that the other day Dad and Charlie were chasing eachother around the counter with Charlie in his walker, and Dad on the computer wheelie chair. How cute!

This year I also got back into painting, and I wrote a novel. A shitty novel to be sure, and something that will never see the light of day. But goddamn it felt good to do it. I wrote 50,000 words in a month! And next year will be better, because - well, it can't get worse! Onward and upward!

Goals for the new year? Well... They come under a few headings I guess.

Money:
I want to continue my savings so that by the end of 2010 I'll have at least $5000 for my trip to America in July 2011 for Leakycon. If I have more - even better! I might be able to travel elsewhere in America, maybe go visit Lils in Canada, or even go over to the UK and visit my heimat.

Me:
I want to be healthier. I know I say it too often, but seriously Amanda! You're 23 now - get a grip! I need to get into some kind of routine of walking more, and eating more healthy foods in smaller portions.

I also need to continue to be creative. I feel so accomplished when I get a painting out, and when I write poetry or stories. The big one in 2010 will be to write a novel in November that isn't as crappy as the last one, and that I can maybe work on to get published one day. But apart from that, I also want to produce at least 6 major paintings.

Us:
I need to keep my relationship with Nannal as honest as possible. I find the times when I get the most disillusioned with our relationship are when I let things happen in my head. I mean, when I have dialogue and play through situations without actually talking to Nannal about it. Reality checks are needed! I know are relationship is not perfect. But I also know I want it to keep going... which will be tough since we've been together for a little over 4 years now. We will celebrate (hopefully) our 5 year anniversary in November 2010.

For 2 people who at the start were afraid of commitment, we're doing pretty well.

Career:
This one is trickier. I want to get a job that will lead somewhere and will employ my mind as much as my physical labour. That is not as easily done as said.

To that end though I will be studying my Graduate Certificate of Criminology and Criminal Justice, so that I will be more qualified to work in a field that both interests me and employs more regularly than plain old anthropology or online anthropology (even rarer me thinks).



And I think that's it! Baby steps really. I need to identify the things that make me happy, and the things that will make me happy to achieve and break them down into doable baby steps. Life is for living, and I really want to feel that I've lived.

Community Online

Slack slack slack I have been. But really, when all you do all day is a variation on surfing the web, trying to find a job, cleaning, cooking (watching too much masterchef) and watching TV/DVDs, what is there to blog about?

I guess with my increased viewing of the News I could comment on the big stories, like the Iranian elections, the Air France disaster, and the horrible things happening in many parts of the world, but really, I don't think what I have to offer could contribute very much since my understanding of the situation is based mostly on snippets seen on biased news stations.

However, I have made a decision. I will blog at least once a week. I will even try to blog about something interesting. I know... bold move.

So for the first attempt at something interesting, here is my take on:

Community Online

This is a topic I could talk your ear off about. It is a major point in studying the Internet from an Anthropological perspective, as well as generally interesting for any one who regularly uses the web.

For me I find the concept of community online at once both attractive and confusing. When you are part of an online community, there is no doubt that there really is a sense of community. However when you are not part of an online community there is a sense of disbelief that such a sense could occur.

For example, I was part of an online community of viewers/participants in the LonelyGirl15 phenomenon. I actually came to it fairly late, but was around for the last 2 seasons. In watching regularly, and being an active part of the forums, it was easy to identify myself as part of the community. We solved problems together, we knew eachother's names. We knew eachother's quirks and biases. However it took intensive involvement to feel like a real part of this community of fans.

On the other hand, nowadays twitter is becoming massive. A lot of people talk about the ways that twitter is interactive and social, but for me, as someone who follows many people, but only has advertisers following me (I guess they think that I will be so grateful that someone cares that I'll buy their product...), twitter is more like television, or news headlines. I am updated constantly on what people are doing. I can reply to what people are doing, but I never hear anything back. It is entirely one way for me. It isn't that way for everyone though... for example several of the people I follow are friends (online and off) who tweet, retweet and reply to eachother. They sometimes have entire conversations via twitter. But for someone who is really only following because I am a fan of these people and the creative work, I am not really a part of the community.

The begs the question - what is community?

Oh and what a question. Anthropology has tried to answer this question so many times, and before the internet community usually suggested vague links to do with common interest, and common geography. For example I live in the Barossa Valley and people talk frequently about the community here.

With those vague guidelines I guess community online makes sense. Common interest is obvious - you can be part of a community on YouTube that vlogs about certain things, or a group online in favour of something, part of a fandom etc. Common geography in a less traditional sense makes sense as well. While we are definately not all in the same physical location, we generally converge on particular sites. For example there are You Tube communities, LonelyGirl15.com, Harry Potter fans at leaky-cauldron.org, or mugglenet.com. Groups of people with common interests often form their own sites with forums that they can interact on and discuss the topic or topics that bind them.

But with online communities, more so (I think) than offline communities, there is a heavier emphasis on participation. While I am part of the Barossa community, I don't really do anything. I shop in the Barossa and I live here, but I don't participate in community events really. Whereas online I would not count myself as part of a community unless I was involved. I would have to at least join the site, at least read some forums or articles etc., in order to feel that I was part of a community, and in order for others to feel that I was too.

I guess with online communities that emphasis on participation is needed because unless you participate, no one actually knows you exist. In the Barossa community I am counted in because I live in the Barossa. I have an address in the Barossa and people (if they look hard enough) know where I am. Online if I just lurk, so to speak, no one knows I exist, and I can't be a part of a community if I effectively don't exist to the other members.

So I guess that is the sticking point... Interaction. Involvement. Interest. Ooooh. Three I's... isn't that convenient?

More analysis would be easier if I actually made an effort to research the specific ways that people define community in anthropological texts and elsewhere, but I feel that most people don't go on definitions that theorists have made over the last 100 years. Most people do what I do, and define them based on their experiences. "When is the word community most used in the context of my life?" is a more useful question than "What does the Oxford Student's Dictionary (now with colour!) say about community?" or "What did that man 40 years ago say about community?".


Aaaanyway. That went on for a lot longer than I planned. But at least I can say I've done something this morning. ^.^

xo